I'm hap...sa...py...d

Ok, im almost done...days away actually, and super excited and happy about going home and to see all my friends, but at the same time, i'm really struggling with leaving here. I don't want to leave everyone. I know this is the same thing i posted last time, but it's true. Anyway, finals have been going well. Ive been pretty happy with it. ok, so i really don't have much to say, but rachel wanted me to blog, so im just adding pics :-)

Almost done...

School is almost over. I can’t believe I have been here for nine months. Life is flying by faster than I can hold on sometimes, but the times I do grab hold are amazing. I can’t believe how much I have been blessed here this year. The friends I’ve found along the way are absolutely amazing. I can see God’s hand moving in my life this semester to bring the people into my life that He did. When I got here, I was terrified. I knew no one, but through a series of seemingly coincidental events, I have come to make some of my best friends here. Good thing I ascribe to the “you can have more than one best friend” philosophy. Otherwise I would be in some trouble. So yep, here is another “friend” post and if you’ve been reading my blog for any amount of time you know I can get sappy….but I won’t J I just wanted to say that all of them are great and crazy, which makes them a ton of fun…im praying for all of you in the last few weeks of school…and as for all you other awesome friends out there, I’m planning on seeing most of you within the next few weeks!! Here are some pics...sadly not everyone went that night...

Procrastination = Exhaustion

It's 2:05am...and i'm taking a break. I say a break because i still have a lot to do tonight...or this morning or whatever i'm currently surviving. I say surviving because that is precisely what i'm doing. I'm trying to keep my head above the waters of projects, papers, and those annoying little assignments that you never seem to finish during the semester. I am at the point where staring at my computer screen just isn't making much sense. It seems like words are pluralizing themselves or putting themselves in past tense, even when i don't ask them to. I'll write a sentence, and it looks like an eight year old was typing blindfolded after spinning in a circle ten times. Let me describe my current surroundings to you, because that is just what i need, to spend some time in some descriptive writing to wake my brain up...or maybe i just need more coffee. I am sitting in the dorm hallway staring at doors which are gateways to rooms full of slumbering people who have a much better work ethich than i do. The lights in the hallway are bright...which is nice because for the longest time, hiedi lost the little tool thing to turn the lights on and off, so they were stuck in some kind of half on, half off purgatory. To my left are two other girls working on homework...one struggling throught the same paper i am breaking from, and the other studying for something that has to do with nursing. Directly beside me is my notebook, opened to the syllabus for National Government where i find all of my requirements for aforementioned paper. To my right, i have spread out my belonging. I have a bag of pretzels that i have to snack on while i write. Next to that is my empty coffee cup, which i'm wishing wasn't empty. My coffee maker, which i moved out to the hallway so that my coffee cup could remain filled tonight is sitting vancant because i don't have the motivation to get up an make another cup. And finally, there sits my crumpled robe in a pitiful pile on the floor. I got it out for a time of reminisencing about the good old days when i could be dressed in layers, but if i wasn't in a skirt, i had to wear that beautiful robe i've had forever. O, wow, so both of the girls who were studying have gotten up and dispersed to various locations. The bathroom is always a popular destination this late at night because people drink caffeinne in high doses to maintian some degree of alertness. Well, i've just taken a 15 min break from my paper, and i think i'm awake...ok not really...not at all, but i gotta get back to the paper. I hope you are all sleeping soundly in your comfy beds and dreaming about fluffy sheep named Bob and Frank that drive fast cars :-)

Not what i should be...

Well, just to begin, i am not currently doing what i should be. What is that you ask? Well, its probably that powerpoint for that huge presentation i have on monday. I have this twenty minute presentation to give on the history and discrimination of Native Americans, and as of right now, its looking like a good five minutes if throw in an activity. O well, i have a red bull that i've been saving for just such an occasion, and i plan on using it in about an hour. I just can't seem to get into this project. Maybe it's all the distractions i've been encountering lately.

Yesterday was just one of those days where everything goes wrong. Little things...like having my ride home fall through...like having to work in an unfamiliar environment, not knowing where anything is, and seemingly assuring parents that i have no competence whatsoever to watch their children...then staying at work an extra half hour trying to figure out how to close the room in which i had never previously worked. Then, after finally being able to return to my dorm room, imagine my suprise when i got on a national news site, only to read that the airline on which i was going to fly to TN decided to cease operations immediately, so much for that great fifty dollar travel voucher they sent me.

Then i had a discussion with a good friend of mine of how fake Christians are, and the sad fact is, as a whole, Christians can't dispute the fact. Where have all the genuine Christians who want to live their lives to impact others gone? When did we fall into this rut of wanting to look like we deserve God's mercy? Heads up people...we don't deserve it. Don't you remember? Christ ate with the publicans and sinners, not the Pharisees who seemed to have it all put together. If God was coming for the perfect, He wouldn't have come at all...we all fail. But God loved us, and when we were horrible wretched sinners, He reached down and gave us His Son. So, why can't we reach out to that neighbor who has an old box from a 12-pack in his trash every week. Why can't we share the gospel with that girl who is expecting a little girl in a few months that she is going to be raising alone? Never forget who you were before Christ came into your life. You're a sinner. You're responible for the nails that were pounded into Christ's wrists. But what a blessing that He did it as a free gift for us. How amazing that He loved a wretched sinner so much that He died for them...for me...for you? And yet we can't even bear looking at the person next door. Since when is it our choice who to share God's love with? Guess im not what i should be...

Hives aren't just for bees...

So yesterday started out great. I woke up on time, understood what my probs and stats class was all about, got a mocha in chapel because of peter and ryan's last minute run to speedway, and didn't really feel like killing myself after my other four classes. I got to work, not only on time but a with a few minutes to spare, and there i found out i only had two kids. Then i got to combine with the class that i used to work in, and i miss. I was pretty happy about all of it. At around 3:30, i brought the kids in for snack. I had the fourteen of them wash their hands and sit down at the table. The only problem was i had gotten a misquito bite on my chin while we were outside...but o well. It was probably the easiest snack transition i have ever had. I passed out snack, peanut butter and crackers or pretzels, and gave each kid a glass of water. Thats when i noticed that my arms were a little itchy, but i didn't really pay attention. Then, i took off my hoodie....my arms were bright red and splotchy. I was breaking out in something and it scared the fire outta me. So, i called down one of the ladies i work with, and she took one look at me and told me i was breaking out in hives, and i needed to go to the health center immediately. She went to get a girl to come in my room, so i could leave. I started getting a little shaky, prolly just because of the shock of breaking out in hives and my mind not really understanding what was going on. I left for the healthcenter and the nurse told me i had an allergic reaction to something. Well...duh. I got benadryl and went back to work...four hours later i broke out again...and this morning...and just now after dinner.... And here are some pics...here's my arm after two benadryl when i was at work yesterday...

and here's my arm right now...

My plans for the rest of my life...

College. Pre-registration packets were distributed today, and i was once again assured that i am going to be here for the rest of my natural life. I guess it makes sense because i have absolutely no idea what i'm planning on doing for rest of my life if i actually did graduate. So for now, my plans include continuing in school forever, maybe getting an apartment in Watertown, and living out my days in the cold and frozen forsaken land that is wisconsin. To make matters slightly more frustrating, no classes are fitting because i'm a transfer student. O well....time for homework...the last thing i need is to fail and have to take classes over...

Jesus loves me...

So we sang a pretty profound song in chapel yesterday. It's a song i sing every Sunday, yet there are times it just hits me what its really saying. It's Jesus Loves Me. How simple is the truth that He does, and how amazing. Ok, so right now im going to rewrite the song...it prolly won't be all that great, but its my blog and i can do whatever i want :-)

Jesus loves me despite my sin
When i let the world come in
He who died to set me free
Has to watch me live for me

Jesus loves me i know its true
He shows it every day anew
Yet i live life my own way
Never pausing just to pray.

Jesus loves me when i fall
And He watches over all
He picks me up and heals my pain
Then lets me down to try again

Jesus loves me and i pray
For desire to serve Him every day
Help me to my Lord be true
Serving Him in all i do.